Pet Bird Bonding

Bonding - that all important first step so essential to a parrot/human relationship. For a successful bond to be made, it is vital to have a trust base. Without trust, there can simply can not be a bond!

Contrary to popular myth, it is NOT essential to hand feed a baby parrot in order for it to bond successfully with you. It IS important for a bird to have been hand fed, by a positive-based nurturer, who has fostered trust and provided guidance from an early age. Parrots, however, are capable of forming many bonds throughout their lifetimes. The better the socialization and nurturing guidance provided from the beginning, the easier it is for a parrot to form new bonds.

Just like humans, parrots form different bonds with different people (and birds) in their lives. Your bird may have a primary bond with you, where you provide the bulk of the feeding, cleaning, and one on one interaction. Then there may be a different bond with your spouse, who perhaps provides special treats and occasional "hangouts" together. Your children may have yet another bond in providing silliness and special games. Then there are various degrees of bonding with other birds in the household, or even the family dog. All of these bonds are special and unique relationships. It is my belief that the more chances for a parrot to have numerous positive relationships, the healthier your bird is. Should something happen where you and your bird have to part company for some reason, a bird that has been encouraged to have multiple healthy relationships throughout it's life will adapt much more successfully and make new bonds much more smoothly than one who has been kept in a "one person" mode. Parrots are by nature highly social and sociable, critters and it's your duty as a caregiver, to foster trusting birds.

So, how do we do this? First off, if you really want to maintain a strong primary bond with your bird, don't get him a buddy! Especially another bird of the same species, where a true "pair-bond" will most likely form. Even in cross-species "buddy bonds" birds can become territorial and aggressive toward their humans during hormonal times.

Secondly, although we love and indulge our parrots, don't "spoil" them in the sense that you are not providing guidance. Like young children, parrots want and need "rules" and guidelines for living. Ignore most negative behaviors, and strongly reinforce the positive ones. Use "step up/down," play "the towel game," give lots of positive reinforcement every time ("Good step up!" "Good bird!" "I like that!") Don't succumb to "quick fix" techniques, don't lose your temper and don't personalize perceived "mean" behavior from your bird. Gain an understanding of basic parrot behavior, practice positive reinforcement, and reinforce trust. Then your bonds will be strong and healthy ones.

by Marilu Anderson, Bird Nutrition and Behavior Consultant
Phone: (503)771-BIRD